The Determinant

Good bye, proud world! I'm going home; Thou art not my friend, and I'm not thine.

2011-08-07T11:21:00.000-05:00

Well, there you have it. Some of my darkest thoughts, inner workings, reasonings, and imaginings, rolled up into a pack of half-truths and prevarications and straight-up lies. Perhaps you've come to know me better, or perhaps you've come to appreciate my writing. Whatever the ends, I'm sure the means were justified. It only felt right. The whole purpose of NaNoWriMo2010 was to destroy all of

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (12)

2011-07-11T01:10:00.002-05:00

So here we are. We're more than halfway through NaNoWriMo and I'm nearly out of poisonous things to write. It's been less of a fictional novel and more of a collection of disjointed stories and memories that I really want to purge before I leave for college. In a way, I guess this NaNoWriMo is all about new beginnings as much as it is about endings. I want to enter college a tabula rasa,

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (11)

2011-07-10T01:58:00.002-05:00

How relative the world appears to its observers. How odd it is that we all see a different spectrum of colors, yet we can all decide on what to call them. Granted, there is some argument over yellow-green or green-yellow, but in the end, we still know it's not purple-brown or orange-white. Why is it that we all perceive a slightly different spectrum, but we can still settle on constancies?

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (10)

2011-07-08T12:26:00.002-05:00

Once upon a time, there was a magical castle that was always on fire. In fact, since this was the age where everything was on fire, everything was on fire! The people, the peasants, the king, the trees, the dragon, the bushes, the grasses. The rocks were on fire, the clouds were on fire, the sky was on fire. Hell, even the fire was on fire. Anyway, one day the flaming prince meets a

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (9)

2011-07-07T17:52:00.000-05:00

Today, I woke up covered in ashes and I don't know why. Well, I do know why. I burned down an apartment building last night. What I don't know, however, is why I didn't shower when I got home. Now I have to clean out my sheets and blankets, as they're filled with soot and ashes and huge black smears. That's almost the start of a short story I wrote, once. I changed it because I'm

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (8)

2011-07-07T00:05:00.002-05:00

I hadn't meant to discover the truth. It was just an idle conversation I has having with my dad about the side of the family I never see. It was really innocent, I swear. I was just confused about one of my cousins who I've never even spoken to. "Well," my dad said. "Your uncle David has been married twice. Once, to Margot, and now, to Christine. Margot had a daughter before they

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (7)

2011-07-06T13:59:00.000-05:00

"So fucking what?" I ask her. "So fucking what?" Her eyes well with tears. Apparently I'm supposed to feel bad now. "No. That's not gonna fucking work on me again, Kathy. I learned my lesson from last time. I learned my lesson. Never trust a fucking bitch." "You're such a dick, Tyler." Mary was glaring at me. I didn't fucking care. "Maybe. Probably. It doesn't

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (6)

2011-07-05T23:01:00.000-05:00

We're standing on an invisible floor out over the Grand Canyon. Everything suggests that we should be falling to our deaths, that we should be screaming out lungs out. But we're not. We're in awed silence at the beauty spread out in front of, around, and beneath us. By our senses, it doesn't make sense. But through some cosmic power, we can walk on the solid air and gape at the humongous

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (5)

2011-07-05T13:06:00.000-05:00

One day, they took all the alcohol on planet Earth and burned it. They poured all of the bottles of schnapps, whiskey, vodka, martinis, beer, wine, hard lemonade, hard limeade, and all the other alcoholic beverages ingested for pleasure, into a large, large tub. Then, they lit it on fire. It burned for months and ruined the atmosphere for years and years and years. But nobody cared,

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (4)

2011-07-05T01:36:00.005-05:00

I have to crank these fifteen hundred words out rather quickly because I'm so tired and so busy. Drama club is such a bigger commitment than I thought it would be, between being the assistant director for the show, which also includes understudy duties for Kayden because of his hectic job schedule, in addition of the Steve Martin Show. The Steve Martin Show should take care of itself after

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (3)

2011-07-04T11:59:00.002-05:00

When I was in first or second grade, my sister was in the hospital. She was feeling fatigued and was just sick in general, with chronic colds and the occasional bout with pneumonia. No, wait. I don't want to tell that story. Not yet, at least. Or maybe never. It's not that important or poisonous to me anymore. I like to guard my stories, guard my poisons from others. My stories are

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (2)

2011-07-03T14:35:00.004-05:00

Sometimes, you don't really know the people around you as well as you think you. You say that they're your friends and that you know them better than other people. And that might be true. You might actually know them better than other people. But that doesn't mean that you know them completely. I guess the first time I truly experienced this was when one of my friends tried to commit

Peacenthal: An Anthology of Wishes, Anecdotes, and Other Poisonous Thoughts (1)

2011-07-03T04:39:00.001-05:00

This is what I wrote for NaNoWriMo 2010. It is here in the raw, unedited format, although I did cut the boring pre-story which had been my NaNoWriMo project. What follows is the original product, names and everything, as originally written in November 2010. As it was written at a very dark point in my life, the topics covered can be dark and oftentimes morose. Let it be known that I no longer

The True Story

2011-05-01T03:07:00.000-05:00

So, this'll be one of the old-fashioned rage posts. I'm fairly certain it's of the flavor my 35 followers, most of whom I assume are robots, like. So, sit back and get ready to watch the rage roll. This edition comes from places I've probably talked about before. But maybe not. We could be breaking new ground tonight. Hold on to your hats! Let me start about one or two months ago, when I

87 (Obligatory New Year's Post, 2011 Edition!)

2011-03-09T23:39:00.000-06:00

So this is the new year. And I feel plenty different. How's this new year treating me? Well, first, let's reflect on how the last year treated me. Remember when I said I was going to take 2010 and make it my own? That didn't really happen, as you all know. Between the February From Hell to the Prom From the Place Down the Road From Hell, it wasn't exactly optimal. So anything's a step up

I Know You're There

2011-01-03T22:50:00.000-06:00

Shortest post ever, but hopefully you'll read this. I miss you.

Monster/Suicide/America

2010-12-25T18:22:00.000-06:00

Since the beginning of the school year, I've been thinking about where I was a year ago and where I am now. Well, exactly a year ago, I was in my dyslexic relationship, but it was before I had known it was dyslexic. I was happy. The happiest I'd ever been. It's only been a year, and I've already moved so far. Arguably, I'm in the darkest place I've ever been. But why dwell on that, when we

Drifting

2010-12-15T22:09:00.000-06:00

Woo, have I been a little odd lately or what? It was pretty neat seeing stuff that I'd written come to life in the form of what everyone calls one of the best Band Revues yet. I'm really proud of the show and all it became, and I'm glad I got to contribute so much to it. Best senior yet! So...I feel a bit mentally homeless, lately. My mind usually functions within a single thought, a larger

A's Red-Letter Day

2010-09-18T18:48:00.000-05:00

Hope? Hope makes me laugh, and laugh, and laugh. Oh boy. Hope is a liar, a trickster, a thief. Hope takes your heart and turns it against you when everything goes wrong. Hope if for people who can't understand that the world is out to get them, that there's no such thing as a happy ending, and that nothing is what it seems. Hope makes a fool out of you. Hope proves you wrong time and time

The B-side

2010-09-14T21:28:00.001-05:00

I am the fleeting urge to lean in for a kiss, the undying hope of loving embrace; I am the uncontainable light dwelling within, the instinctual words, so out of place; I am the picture show playing behind your eyes, the pang of sadness as he turns and goes, the secret seer, planning ahead, unasked, untried; who knows? I wrote the romantic crescendo music, the terrible love poems on your phone;

Trapped!

2010-09-07T23:24:00.000-05:00

There's really no better way to put this, but I feel like I'm trapped in my own body. I see two distinct selves who I identify with: there's the quiet, analytical, cold, smart, pessimistic, unfeeling Bassoon. We'll call him A. Then there's the vocal, emotional, dramatic, engaged, romanic Bassoon. We'll call him B. I feel like A has beaten B down to mere thoughts and implications. A, who

A Letter

2010-07-22T02:04:00.003-05:00

Y'know, I wrote this a long time ago. Around the Fourth of July, actually, back when I was dealing with the death throes of the crush on O. That was a toughie to toss off.I like to think of each crush as a logical progression in a long line of self-betterment. There was the crush on N. That made me realize things about myself that I hadn't quite come to terms with. The crush on O made me

He Said, He Said

2010-07-10T04:14:00.003-05:00

Mel had a decent idea and I think I'll steal it. There's a lot of stuff I've wanted to say for awhile, but I haven't had the guts to say it, so I might as well spill it before it boils over and becomes a real problem, because it certainly will.I guess I'll start with Mel. Mel, the only thing I can really think to say is that I'm really proud of you for standing up strong in the face of all your

Familiar Scenery

2010-07-07T03:25:00.004-05:00

Hey, we've been here before! Relapsed crushes sure are a bitch, aren't they? But I guess one benefit is that you know how it goes. You know how to worry it out, which thoughts will lead to happiness, which thoughts won't, which thoughts will prolong your suffering, which thoughts will quickly stop all hope. You know exactly where you left off, and you're just as unsure how to continue. Based

Chicken Soup for the Dying Soul

2010-06-20T04:27:00.001-05:00

If you find a better replacement for something you already have, you buy it and throw the old one away.And the old one gets forgotten and never used again. You don't even remember how many shoes you've had, do you? But they're still around, in landfills or closets or under beds; they gather dust and slowly weather away to a few strips of fabric and rubber.But nobody stopped to think about how

Asymmetry

2010-05-08T23:51:00.001-05:00

JessieJonKarenHemantDeannaAronWarren

Just Some Thoughts

2010-04-03T00:40:00.003-05:00

I always get these urges to say exactly what's on my mind, and it's usually for really hopeless romantic type stuff. My mind laughs at itself for thinking up such corny things. And they're not really appropriate to say when I'm with someone who doesn't know I like them, even a little bit.I also get urges to grab and hold certain people's hands. Just grab them, hold them close, interlace

Sea and Sand

2010-03-28T01:44:00.003-05:00

So, let's talk about Prom.I might publish this one on both blogs, to see how it goes. But probably not.Prom is about one month away and I officially have nobody to go with. Well, not officially. I could still ask O, or K, or T, or any random person I wanted. But nobody'd say yes. Well, G would. But then again, she asked me to take her to my prom.keeps trying to convince me that it'll be

The Trust

2010-03-08T21:01:00.001-06:00

I'm posting this to my secret blog because I can't trust any of you.

Obligatory New Year's Post

2010-02-20T14:11:00.002-06:00

Happy New Year!...okay, so maybe it's two or three months late, but screw you. I was caught up in stuff. It's not like it matters, anyway. Because I didn't make a resolution and I'm in fundamentally the same place as the last blog post.My life is like a state function. What matters is the final value and initial value, not the path. Sure, I was happy betwixt November and now. Sure, it was

Thanks-Fucking-Giving

2009-11-26T15:23:00.004-06:00

Whoop de fucking do. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. It's the holiday I hate most out of all of them. Long time no blog. So it goes. Maybe I'll get into it. Things and stuff happen, you know?So, what am I thankful for?I think it'd be easier to start with what I'm NOT thankful for.I'm not thankful for the way my family argues at every gathering, the way my mom drinks, the way my parents argue,

Words

2009-10-05T19:26:00.001-05:00

if like way neglected I've assumed all work out worry dread fear where open who I am and where I'm going want okay less than doesn't like me change is could could move on move on worry infinite dread

I read his 200th blog post and all I got was this angst...

2009-09-27T22:07:00.003-05:00

Somewhere, there's a universe in which everything you've ever wanted has come true. Somewhere, there's a universe where you've been deprived of everything you've ever wanted.I've been dwelling in the former for too long and now it feels like the latter. I don't know how to reconcile these two existences when they are both possible and neither are achievable. I wish there was a way to travel to

I made my own bed. I'll lie in it.

2009-09-03T23:53:00.002-05:00

Yeah, no. Gloom and doom, etc.Let's press F5 and start this all over. Maybe I'll get a better starting throw. Pick a different dump stat, you know. Reroll this character and see where it takes me.If only it were that simple. Let's throw a cinderblock through the houseboat that is my life. Maybe we'll stay afloat."Why do they all go, why do they all go, why do they all go, why do they all go

Summer Ends, Plans Begin

2009-09-01T00:35:00.003-05:00

Summer's dead, but here's a list of cities I want to visit in my lifetime.1. New York City, New York, USA2. Boston, Massachusetts, USA3. Washington DC, District of Columbia, USA4. Chicago, Illinois, USA5. Fort Wayne, Indiana, USA6. Minneapolis/St. Paul, Minnesota, USA7. St. Louis, Missouri, USA8. New Orleans, Louisiana, USA9. Las Vegas, Nevada, USA10. Portland, Oregon, USA11. Providence, Rhode

Poo-tee-weet?

2009-08-27T02:18:00.003-05:00

Once again, I we have found ourselves at the end of a summer wasted.That's not to say I didn't do anything this summer. Oh no, I've accomplished a lot of stuff. New lappy, broke three pairs of headphones, got my wisdom teeth out, finished Slaughterhouse Five, started Nan09 research...all sorts of stuff accomplished.I think next summer, I want to have a book list to read so I have something to

Won't It Be Odd To Be Happy Like We Always Thought We're Supposed To Feel But Never Seem To Be?

2009-07-26T02:34:00.007-05:00

I am somewhere in the mindset of utter chaos, serenity, melancholy, pensiveness, and exhaustion.What the fuck? Just plain WTF. Right now, I'm in a thicket of lust or love and I'm trying to work out which is which. It's a bit reminiscent of the caterpillar on the sphere who thinks it's a plane. How can he see that it's a sphere and not a plane? If he knew that on a plane, the angles of a

Connect the Wires and Plug Me In

2009-07-17T23:58:00.003-05:00

It's been more or less a month since I've made a semi-normal, coherent blog post. So let's try to crack that skill.So much has been happening and yet nothing at all. Last night I saw Jupiter with my own two eyes as it rose in the south. I love my telescope. Jessie got back from Germany, Tori's leaving for Louisiana, Hemant and Dani formed Danmont, and I have entered another phase of angsty

Summer Skin

2009-07-13T00:07:00.005-05:00

Up on a hill is where it began, this little story, a long time ago. Friday night and everyone's moving. I can feel the heat, but it's soothing. I can't stay much longer, riding my decision home in the dark... I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams. What if I've lost my direction? What if I've lost a sense of time?Thought I ran into you down on the street. Then it turned

Afterwords

2009-06-23T16:04:00.004-05:00

I haven't been blogging as often as I used to and I haven't been writing as often as I used to. I'll have to get back into it.Last night, Tori and Deanna baked a cake for Sam, who was sick. But then Sam lived too far away, so they invited me to take it to Aron's house with them. So I drove and we ate cake in Aron's driveway and then we moved into his basement when the mosquitoes got too bad.

The Long-Awaited Special 2009 Blog

2009-06-13T00:25:00.002-05:00

So, it's all been leading up to this blog post. Let's get on with it.Be awesome, Sam. Stay safe, Roger. Have an awesome life, Holly. Go for your dreams, Maria. Stay interesting, Devyn. Bye, Kevin. See you later, Lizz. Later, Nate. Thanks for loaning your book to me, Zak. It was nice getting to know you, Haley. See you, Apeksha. Have a great life, Natalie. It was nice getting to know

Get Away

2009-05-23T00:08:00.001-05:00

Gotta get away.----------------Listening to: The Killers - Read My Mindvia FoxyTunes

We're Done Politesse

2009-05-20T23:15:00.004-05:00

Hey blog. I've neglected you! I'm sorry. I have no excuse.I guess my life has been kinda "in-my-mind" for the past week or so. May is nearly gone. Soon it'll be summer and my stress clock will reset itself and rest for three months while I have nothing to do.Ah, summer. Hurry up!I really wish I could just ask and get truthful answers. But alas, things are not so.----------------Listening

Listen to Me While I Talk to the Wall

2009-05-11T21:23:00.004-05:00

I'm doing something I haven't done for a long, long time.Today I'm listening to Tori. Not reading lines and replying and stuff, but truly listening. Analyze, respond, analyze, reply. Think with the brain, not with the fingers.I forgot how therapeutic this was. I don't need to vent about my problems. I just need to listen to other people. It lowers my stress. It takes my mind off of

Green Grass

2009-05-02T00:02:00.002-05:00

Photos are uploading on Facebook, so I’m writing in word for the time being.Today was big, awesome, and full of adventure.It felt fun and free to get lost for a long time and to just enjoy nature and friends.The story begins at the end of the day.I wanted to do something after school, so I rallied the Extended Network and got Tori, Tyne, Jessie, Dani, and Jon to respond, so we decided to do

TGIAF

2009-04-30T20:55:00.003-05:00

Thank god it's almost Friday.This week has taken nearly everything out of me. It's the week after the musical and everything is nice and calm except for the twenty million essays I have due. School's drawing to a close, but it might literally close due to the swine flu outbreak occurring everywhere.Hmmm, my pulse is really low. 54 beats per minute. I must really be mellowed out tonight. I'm

Existence

2009-04-09T22:56:00.002-05:00

Today can evenly be split into half: the good half and the bad half.The good half ran up to around 5:15, where Drama club started getting boring and I wandered off to go write in my Little Black Book. I didn't come out until 6, when the rehearsal started.The bad half is pretty much from there on. The rehearsal as a whole sucked. Oh well.Lately I've been sinking into that typical feeling of

Shattered

2009-04-04T22:59:00.003-05:00

This post is about many things, of which many intertwine but some do not. Try to follow.The bandies in the Extended Network saw the Dallas Brass Band today. My brain has currently been blown. It's been numbed by awesome and win. They are the epitome of what EoP should become. I'm so charged. I want to do it, to entertain with music. We can do it. bandDirector apparently knows about us. I

I'm Not That Naive

2009-03-31T15:32:00.002-05:00

I don't normally post this early, as I haven't been addled by lack of sleep yet. But I post this in response to a recent blog post by my friend.I told you. I told you about this weird feeling, the vague hopelessness, the sensation. And finally, after nearly a year of almost brushing it off, it hits you too.Welcome to my head. Every moment, every event, it's all bittersweet. It's fun and

Lights out!

2009-03-28T21:44:00.002-05:00

Because I participated in Earth Hour, today's short blog comes directly from the typewriter.I really should take better care of this typewriter. Writing on a typewriter gives one a certain sense of nostalgia. Especially when you're writing in the dark. I should get this thing fixed up. I'd really like to use this more. I really enjoy using the typewriter when I get it out. It's a lot like a

Hear the Echoes and Calls

2009-03-20T22:19:00.002-05:00

I got my "PLAN" results today. They're pretty much better than what I expected. It said I should look for Engineering and Technologies jobs.So far, so good.This has reignited my flame for looking up colleges and planning my future. I'm pretty sure that I'll end up at MSOE. I really want to. So why not?I want to use their transfer program to go to Germany for my junior year. That's September

New Digs

2009-03-18T22:00:00.002-05:00

So, a multitude of new things happening right now!I'm thinking about redoing the whole layout of my blog with the magic of HTML and CSS, so watch this space!Inversely, we have four (five?) more people added to the email list! Hey, new viewers! Ease of access has increased!And finally, those three moleskines I bought? One of them is becoming a sort of physical blog. (If you're Aron, say "diary

Je Tente Destin

2009-03-14T21:25:00.003-05:00

I can't quite explain it. Every time I shuffle a song from "Sam's Town", by the Killers, I always feel compelled to continue listening to the whole album. What I also can't explain is this weird feeling of inspiration/freedom/hope that the album gives me. I suppose part of it can be explained by the fact that that I began every morning last summer by listening to the whole album, so I'm

Numb

2009-03-10T23:43:00.003-05:00

I feel numb all over.Not physically numb, like when you've fallen asleep on an arm or something, but mentally numb. It feels like my brain is filled with static that clogs my thoughts and jams my thinking processes. I never really knew what this felt like until now. It has the slightest sensation of physical numbness in the brain stem, but beyond that, everything else can only be described as

Home, Home, Where I Wanted To Go...

2009-03-05T23:02:00.002-06:00

It's odd.Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can see great pictures in my head, of places that may or may not exist, places that seem almost surreal. I secretly hope that every time I close my eyes, I can see a little glimpse of these places again. But lately, they've been more and more vivid.So I had this dream. In this dream, I'm in a car. The sun's shining through the sun roof (open, of

I Will Follow You Into the Dark

2009-03-02T23:30:00.003-06:00

I feel so strange, so empowered. What is this sudden rush of accomplishment through my veins?I can write a song, the song that's been hatching in my mind for some time now, the song that's eaten away at me for the ages all while I've sat back and indulged in the saccharine bliss that is the song.----------------Listening to: Death Cab for Cutie - What Sarah Saidvia FoxyTunes----------------

Je Suis Fer Homme

2009-02-27T22:20:00.003-06:00

Listening to: Death Cab for Cutie - What Sarah Saidvia FoxyTunes ----------------This song is so depressing but I love it. I love it for the symbolism of the instruments and the truth of the lyrics.And now that I know what one of the most important lines of the song means, I love this song even more. I know what Gibbard was thinking. I know what he was feeling. And I know that Sarah was

Aimless in Wonder

2009-02-26T21:03:00.003-06:00

Caught up in circles again. Confusion is nothing new.So, et tois, bloggers? New developments? I'm learning French with Tori. Nobody else wants to, but I guess that's okay because then we can talk about them and scold them for not learning.Wow. I never thought I'd find someone who has one of the exact same problems that I do. But I did. And it's so weird, because it all connects and it

[insert title here]

2009-02-24T23:49:00.001-06:00

[insert angst here][insert whininess here][insert code here]

Take me back to the start...

2009-02-21T22:53:00.003-06:00

So, February is quickly speeding to a conclusion. FAWM is starting to seem less and less like a good idea. It's impossible to record anything.Anyway, nothing really new happening. Thinking about life and stuff. We went over to Jason's house today after a failed forensics meet because we needed to record.We recorded half a song.That's right, half a song. We were there for six hours and we got

Ow usf'l tw.

2009-02-15T20:17:00.000-06:00

Ozwfwnwj qgm dwsnw lzw jgge, eq zwsjl kafck s dalldw.W=E

Back to the 80s

2009-02-12T22:28:00.002-06:00

So, the musical sounds like it will be a barrel of awesome! It has so many references to the 80s, it can't not be win! Anyway, here's another code, as codes seem to be popular with the viewers.Qvqhm /c,q c /ecut ig eiw nyi.q miz wqhqk c hqdhq/ ui/ dq//cud /i tuiw miz sq//qhlSo, your two hints include:The key is the direction of descent.S=W

"Tickle Her Soul!"

2009-02-10T21:59:00.003-06:00

Yay for crazy wildness in life.So, we played at the big church thing. That's over and done with. The UWAY concert is fast approaching. Then I'll only have one left and I'm FREE! The band concert is in 8 days. Then we can get new music and I can be more esoteric. Forensics still has forever to happen, but I can at least not go to a few of them due to other obligations.So, in short, this

Coded Message

2009-02-09T23:17:00.001-06:00

Negx wmch A bclah xo jccq dotjokx'bqc waxm wmo A 'ts cickzxmahl dm'hlcg,

Dark Clouds Drift Away

2009-02-05T21:37:00.004-06:00

There's so much I want to say, so much that I want to put here, in this open mic of life. It's not really a coincidence that I can't do that.In fact, I wrote a whole long post about my secrets and what some of them were. But now I've deleted that. Oh well.

You Say, "Go Slow." I Fall Behind.

2009-01-30T21:42:00.004-06:00

Been the craziest, wildest month.Scheduling woes have come and passed, UWAY has started up again (alas), Finals have finished, and we are entering the throes of semester 2.Oh, and I'm 16. (Or, as my friends like to put it, "2^4"). The day itself was very mellow, with my family taking me out to dinner at Chili's and my friends giving me a set of speakers for my laptop.And then there was the

The Fine Art of Being Screwed Over

2009-01-08T22:03:00.003-06:00

Tempers flare among the sophomores. Frustration at the system and a feeling of alienation spread through the student body, eating away at earlier plans, putting fear and uncertainty into the minds of many.Including me.So, it all started when the school district suddenly decided that a later start time would be the bee's fucking knees. So, school starts around 8:15. I am a staunch believer in

2009: The Year of Doing Big, Fun, Scary Things

2009-01-01T02:33:00.004-06:00

So, I've compiled a list of 10 (and a bonus) goals I want to accomplish in '09. As they are New Year's Resolutions, don't expect many of them to be accomplished, let alone touched. Here they be.Learn languagesPythonPerlLatinRussianComplete NaNoEdMoRide more bikeMOAR BIKE!Get a better laughMOAR MALEVOLENT!Play bassoon betterCompose a songTake more photographyWake up at 6:15 every morningLearn

Farewell, 2008

2008-12-31T13:13:00.003-06:00

You have less than 11 hours left to say goodbye, 2008. 2009 is on its way and it's nearly here. The familiar, worn out 2008 is mere hours away from being replaced by a new, exciting, unfamiliar year.It feels like I'm referencing a bizarre new country. Uncharted lands, mystical creatures, adventure waiting behind every curve--2009. Just say it. Speaking it aloud, one can almost feel the curve

[Insert Angsty Blog Post Here]

2008-12-27T22:57:00.002-06:00

Wow. What a fail last blog post. I totally suck.Moving on from the angsty past that is my blog, I think everything is going great.

Reluctant Christmas

2008-12-26T01:42:00.003-06:00

It's Boxing Day, and I'm here to regale the events of Christmas to the world at large. Hello, world. How are you all out there? Impoverished, starving, dying? Sounds about right.Is there any reason to feel excited about anything anymore? All excitement is eventually bludgeoned to death by boredom and tragedy. Maybe I'm not living in the moment enough.Anyway, on to the regaling!It doesn't

Thassophobiac

2008-12-23T23:31:00.003-06:00

I am a thassophobiac.Today, Jessie, Tori, and I performed twice at Thassophobia, much to the delight of the first-hour and eighth-hour attendees. We played "Dreaming of You" by the Coral, a typical song, typically played on a guitar, bass, vocalist, and drumset. Instead of that crap, we played it on what we had: a clarinet, a bassoon, a piano, and a vocalist.I think the crowed loved it.

Band Revue Party

2008-12-21T00:36:00.003-06:00

Whooooooooooooooooooooo.Just got back from the band revue party. The show didn't end until about 10 and the party started shortly afterwards. In the cafeteria and all that.It was pretty awesome. A whole lot of people were just everywhere. Some played twister, some played volleyball, some played basketball, and other just wandered around and did random stuff.There was a feeding frenzy when the

Broken

2008-12-19T22:29:00.004-06:00

Oh my god.Oh. My. God.Oh.My.God.It's broken. Destroyed, more fitting. Gone, torn, shattered, ruined DESTROYED!My bassoon.Right before the performance, the right wing joint's connector tube snapped off as it was being adjusted. It was the worst sound I had ever heard in my life. I swear that that second lasted about ten minutes. My breath caught in my throat as I realized what had

Good Fucking Thing

2008-12-15T22:25:00.003-06:00

It's a good fucking think I didn't post a blog post before I left for band revue because then I wouldn't have a ranting outlet available.Oh yes, children. It's time for Shut-The-Fuck-Up-And-Listen-Or-I'll-Kill-You-In-The-Face blogpost! Hooray!So, today starts out like any ordinary Monday, right? Oh, except the fact that I'm awoken an hour early because someone overslept. Not my fucking

Acceptance, or How Last Night's Blog Post Eerily Came True

2008-12-12T22:58:00.003-06:00

So, I did dream last night. And while I was dreaming, my brain was working out how my dream was a metaphor for my predicament. Go id!After that, I went to school. Everything progresses like normal. Then it comes to Wind Symphony, the gateway to the upperclassmen. It started normal, me sitting there, nothing to do. Nicole gets out Band Revue posters and starts coloring. Soon Conor and Caleb

Some Sort of Misery

2008-12-11T23:20:00.004-06:00

I don't know what it is, but I know that it's there.I am talking, of course, about that ever-persistent feeling of hopelessness and misery that seems to be a cloud upon my otherwise complacent life.I don't know what it is. I used to think it was a feeling of uncertainty about the future. Taking that vein, I planned out my four years of high school. I used to think it was about penned-up

Acid

2008-12-08T21:28:00.003-06:00

I thought I could do with a bit of a color change. So I went from dark maroon to eye-burning acid green with a pH of -18. I bring you eye pain!Anyway, things are looking up. The semester is drawing to a close, I've had my second UWAY concert, ending the first semester of UWAY. Only two more to go!I think I need to do one of my biannual laptop reformats. It's a little slow...Say, if

There's nothing I can do now...

2008-12-07T00:45:00.003-06:00

I'm so brave, too bad I'm a baby.Right now, I'm thinking about the future. I am so ready to leave high school behind, but I realized that I'm terrified of graduation.I'm afraid to leave behind everything I've done, learned, met, understood, and received to trade it in for the unfamiliar and unknowable. Going to college means leaving behind Jessie, Tori, Deanna, and every other friend I will

Guilt

2008-12-04T22:31:00.002-06:00

Guilt wracks my soul like a million bags of sand.I didn't go to the LINK Crew's movie night. In fact, I gave away my ticket, calling it stupid.And now that I heard what happened, I hate myself for doing that.Seven sophomores showed up. Seven! And only three of them actually stayed. The other four stole--That's right, STOLE popcorn and then ran! I mean, what the fuck?!I didn't even feel bad

Feels like the weight of the world...

2008-11-30T00:13:00.002-06:00

...has been LIFTED OFF MY SHOULDERS!I'm DONE! I've finished NaNoWriMo a day early. I feel so awesome right now. I feel like I have climbed the tallest mountain! WOOT!

Mwah

2008-11-14T19:50:00.004-06:00

Today feels like a Jimmy Eat World and a Collective Soul night. I don't know why.Anyway, this week was really, really stressful. I'm so glad it's over. Aside from have two lab reports due, I've had to add 1667 words per day to my NaNovel. So far, I'm write (hee) on track. I've had four tests this week, and so far I'm doing really well. My Chemistry grade slipped, but I'll kick it back up a

It's the end of the world as we know it...

2008-11-04T22:11:00.002-06:00

And I don't feel fine.I'd rather talk to a real person right now. Anyone would do. But nobody's online, so now I have to talk to a web server.In short, I am very disappointed in America.Way to go.

What. The. Fuck.

2008-11-01T19:33:00.003-05:00

Okay, I was going to make a post about how awesome Halloween was, but first, I need to go off on a tangent.So, I climb into bed at 3:30 yesterday morning after noveling. I turn on the radio and hear...and hear...Christmas Music.WHAT. THE. FUCK.Okay, I understand Christmas is a time for caring. I understand Christmas is a time for sharing. I understand that if you believe in Christmas things,

Homecoming

2008-10-10T22:41:00.003-05:00

'Twas the Homecoming Game tonight. We lost. Three to one.Oh well. I met a moth. His name was Morty. He was soft. Someone stepped on him and I kept him safe until I let him go.Ugh. I have UWAY dress rehearsal tomorrow. I don't want to go. I don't want to be in UWAY any more. It's not fun. Our band has the ability to refine our skills while making us have fun. The UWAY band is far too

MySpace

2008-10-05T14:54:00.002-05:00

Well, I've finally gotten a MySpace. Also, the blog is now linked to the MySpace, so we may or may not have an influx of new viewers. Hi, influx of new viewers! Take a seat! Get used to the scenery.

Dollar Tree

2008-10-05T00:05:00.003-05:00

Woah, that was weird. WinAmp randomly opened and blocked out blogger. (oh yeah, hi.)So, this post is clearly titled Dollar Tree.Why, you may ask. Dollar Tree is only a dollar store, hardly deserving of a blog post that may one day become historical.I had a revelation.The local Dollar Tree is the focal point in my little web of friends. It's the place to be. We gather there. We shop there.

Villains

2008-09-22T22:26:00.002-05:00

zOMFG! Heroes Season 3 was EPIC!! Epic, epic, epic! (Oh yeah. Long time no see.)Well, I think I have one of the major things figured out.*spoilers*Sylar is the son of Angela Petrelli and Kaito Nakamura. He was given to the Grays.*spoilers*No clue about Mohinder, though. That scene with Elle and Sylar was EPIC! Epic, epic, epic!So, long time no blog. Lots of stuff has happened. I'm up at

Ahoy.

2008-08-12T14:49:00.003-05:00